Hey Kids: Stay Away from Mr. Meaty!

You want to know why kids are so screwed up? I'll tell you why. It's television's fault!

But I'm not talking about all the wholesome sex and violence that always gets a bad rap. I'm talking about so-called "children's programming." In a recent scan of kids shows on my TiVo listings, I came up with more than 20 programs with names that are downright creepy.

For starters, there is a cartoon called "Hi Hi Puffy AmiYumi" about a Japanese rock band -- most certainly the biggest rock band to come out of Japan since... since... since, oh, that other really huge Japanese rock band that I've never heard of.

"Yu-Gi-Oh" is another Japanese production. I can't figure out from the website what it's about, but it appears to be a cartoon about creatures who look like they have been crossbred between humans and cockroaches.

There's another program called Yoko! Jakamoko! Toto! which, from the name, I assumed was Japanese, but it is apparently a British production. According to the program's website, it has a "Spanish and African beat." Ummm, okay. I have never known a Spaniard named Yoko, but I guess this is life in the globalization age. According to Wikipedia, the three characters "communicate only by use of each other's names."

Ahem... that is not how I like to be communicated with. "Dave! Dave? DAAAAAAVE!!!!!"

Other programs with weird names fall into a couple of categories. There are several others with equally meaningless names. There's "Peep," "Zoboomafoo," "Doodlebops," "Boohbah," "Pinky Dinky Doo," "Rolie Polie Olie," and the most staggeringly weird name of all, "Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo."

Where I come from (Planet Earth), if I told my friends I was going home to watch a show called "Pinky Dinky Doo," I would have had my ass kicked. Repeatedly.

As far as "Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo" goes, it turns out it too is from Japan. I don't speak Japanese. Apparently neither does the person who came up with the name of the show.  It is based on a video series in the genre known as manga. AnimeNewsNetwork.com warns the program may contain "bloody violence, bad language, (and) nudity." The website goes on to say the TV show is aimed at teenagers.

What is "Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo" about? Here's the description on the aforementioned anime site:

"In the year 300X, Earth is terrorized by the evil Margarita Empire, which will stop at nothing to rid the entire population of their hair. But now, one afro-wearing man stands his way. He has the ability to communicate with other people's hair and use his own nasal hair to defeat the Margarita Empire's bald henchmen." [sic]

Uhhh... yeah. The name of that bald henchman is, you guessed it, Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo. (Or for the benefit of my faithful readers in Japan, that's ボボボーボ・ボーボボ.)

I found numerous other programs with names that kind of mean something. Names like "Peep" and "Peppa Pig", "Bloopie's Buddies," "Ed, Edd, and Eddy," "Pahappahooey Island," and "Coconut Fred's Fruit Salad Island."

And then, there were four shows with names that were downright disturbing: "Feeling Good with Jojo," "Mr. Dressup," "Mr. Meaty," and -- I swear this is a real television show -- "Gerald McBoingBoing."

When I was growing up, we had wholesome programs like "Super Mega Action Power Killers" or some such thing. My parents taught me to stay away from people with names like Gerald McBoingBoing and Mr. Meaty.

It turns out "Mr. Meaty" is a production of the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation. The show's website urges kids to "Head on down to Mr. Meaty for good times, good friends, and well, MEAT!"

Stop right there. Please. I don't want to know anymore.

Comments

[ben]

Your darn right you don't want to know anymore...but I'm going to tell you anyway..you haven't checked out "Pingoo"(sp?(prounounced ping-goo) it's a show about penguins who don't even speak a language, they just walk around "chirping" for the entire show, and you the viewer has to figure out what the hell the plot is or what the hell they are even doing.!!!!...but I digress...Now if you'll excuse me..I have to go back to hearing the themesong for "Noddy" going in my head(can you tell I'm a parent of a 2 yr. old?).

[Dave Fox]

The theme song to Noddy? As in Noddy and Big Ears?!?!

[Laura E]

Mr. Dressup is an old Canadian show. My Canadian ex has a Mr. Dressup t-shirt. The first time I saw it I was like, wtf is that? It's a classic there, like our Mr. Rogers.

As for Yu-Gi-Oh you're a little late pointing it out. It was a huge craze a couple years ago. It's a cartoon with an accompanying trading card game. Marketing genius.

Mr. Meaty is just creepy. I'm going to have to ask Dan if he knows about it.

You missed a great one though; let's see if I can get this right... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Super_Robot_Monkey_Team_Hyper_Force_Go!

[Laura E]

Apprently the URL is too long?
Here:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/
Super_Robot_Monkey_Team_Hyper_
Force_Go!

[Laura E]

Ha, sorry it's me again. But I checked out the Mr. Meaty site and that isn't a kids show. It's like aimed at teens. See at the top there's a preschool link, a kids link, and then there's "the void." And this show is in "the void." Bad blogging, slop-py! :P

[Ben]

Yes, I'm pretty sure we're talking about the same Noddy. It's one of THE most annoying songs you could ever get in your head...well...of course next to any song from Bread.

[Jen]

Zoboomafoo rocks. My niece and nephew love that show. ;-)

[Ben]

Boopah is the scariest thing on TV today...I'd rather my daughter watch COPS than that show...

[invader zim]

k buddy calm down mr meaty is a funny show and these kids who watch it arent being brainwashed. i dont know who you think you are to make such a big deal about this show. why dont you get a real job instead of putting down others because you have nothing better to do.

[john]

i totaaly agree although mr. meeaty is funny. but puffy ami umi is crap and tota jakamot or what ever is the friken gayest piece of shit that's ever been on tv.. P.S so i yugio

[dickVANdike]

you're an asshole. To think that a cartoon's name is what brainwashes kids. retard.

[Cooper Hudnall]

I hate you

[Cooper]

I hate you

[T.T.]

hey screw, you need to seriously back off your a crazy mc.crazypants to think that just because ed edd and eddy, mr meaty and hihi puffy ami yumi are bad shows. and if you ever come close to saying anything bad about spongebob squarepants, or any other cartoon youre a retarded scruege, you sick jerk i hate you SO much for this. i suggest you get something better to do than bag on good clean cartoons that everyone loves because your also insulting people that like these cartoons, i bet you havent even whatched a modern cartoon all your life , their just as good as the cartoons you used to watch. im serious about that spongebob thing. Im not a kid im an adult that watches cartoons and im proud of it!

[bobbert]

What about maisy she squeaks alot!!
And as mentioned in the theme shes a verry mazing mouse!

One thing you need to know. I don't really agree with some of these shows either but they are going to stay her no matter how hard you try, no matter how much you wine. Personally though, I like these shows. Oh! and I'm a teen. If there is a program you should be pointing to, it should be Adult swim. On cartoonnetwork, they think that kids will be asleep when it is on, but the truth is alot of kids watch it. I hear it everywhere. It's growing right under our noses so I'm just saying that you should be prepared! Don't be such a critic!

[T.T.]

Hi its me T.T. again, um I'm sorry about all the crazy things I said, but i know im right.. I'm not an adult, but I'm not a kid either. I just didnt want anyone to push my feelings about this crazy butthole aside like it didnt matter because im just 13, but hear me out everyone who is here,this guy is CRAZY I mean what kind of phsyco thinks a cartoon's name is what hurts kids,all these children in my classroom and school are waaaaay too young to be watching the stuff on ADULT SWIM!,the stuff on COMEDY CENTRAL! and every other bad tv show out there, but this guy is aiming at the cool stuff that kids are sopposed to watch, this guy is pointing out all the actul GOOD cartoons instead of the bad ones that you aren't suposed to watch. It's like he's suggesting we watch nothing. I say he point out the real problems with adult swim and comedy central to all the kids who watch it, but hey, even if he did he cant do anything about it , so why try? I say he's doing it just to talk. It doesn't make any sense to me!

[T.T.]

I'm sorry Im bad about forgetting what to say, im a goofy 13 year old who watches cartoons and WE and stuf like that, but I dont watch adult swim because its bad for young kids like me, I don't watch it because i dont want to and i think its silly that kids wanna watch this stuff, because its roting their brains. I say ADULTS ONLY. Thank you. I think im gonna wait to watch adult swim... I think 19 or 20 is good, But ill probably be watching cartoons!

[T.T.]

Hel-lo Gerald Mc. Boing Boing is like the coolest show ever, dude. I'm serious. Okay, here's how it goes down: Gerald Mc. Boing Boing is a show about this dude who can't talk, but he uses sounds to communicate with people.I think it's awesome. And he has a dog, who burps it's pretty cool...

[V.W.]

You're just being a smart ass and no-one wants to hear your opinion on anything, weirdo...

[Shinigami]

Ok i think its you freaks that should lay off him, this is up for people to read you dont have to read it if you dont want to you dont have to agree with it if you dont want to but its up here because its someones opinion, if you dont agree with his opinion then give him a reason dont call him or tell him you hate him its pathetic and yes i called you all freaks and it just proves my point, personalkly i think they could think of better and less possibly falic names for these shows but they havent boo hoo shit happens, if this person feels like warning the world then good on him for TRYING to do what he thinks is right and not just coming on here to insult people cause your own life isnt satisfying enough so you have to make other people look and feel bad in order to maike yourself look and feel good he-llo thats called bullying, you bunch of pathetic little people!

[T.T.]

Well guess what SHITigami!? Were presenting OUR opinions on this too so I dont know who the fuck you think you are, but no-one wants to hear YOUR friggin' opinion either!! Youre a shithead calling us names... LOOK WHOS TALKING YOU PATHETIC LOSER!!!

[T.T.]

Shinnigami's a jackass..

[Netbug]

Mr. Meaty can die. In fact, Nick can die.

[T.T.]

Netbug can kiss all of our asses!